Monday, December 31, 2007

Out of the Ordinary

I normally post something TV related, but I need to switch to movies for a moment. And, not even a movie based on a TV show. Last night I saw I Am Legend. Until then I had never walked out of a movie saying, "I hated that!" Now I have. I have left movies feeling upset or disturbed, but not hating the movie. I have even not liked some movies. I Am Legend is the first movie I officially hate. The premise of the film is good, but the execution is lacking. Will Smith does an admirable job portraying the last uninfected person in New York City. The mechanisms he creates t maintain his sanity are great. And 99% of the dialog in the film is actually a monologue by Will. He is great. Nevertheless, as a whole, this movie sucks. There is a glaring hole in the plot that comes out towards the end of the movie.

After about an hour, I was sure the movie had to be almost over. I was pissed to see that I still had about 45 more minutes to sit through. The movie felt interminable. Perhaps that was the film maker's goal. This way we could feel the struggle Will Smith's character is facing. Then again, maybe I am just trying to justify how awful this movie was.

Do not see this film. It is 100 minutes of your life you will never get back.

Monday, December 24, 2007

Finally, The Ultimate in Holiday Music Videos

I have been saving this one just for today. This is proof that pretty people should just be pretty and not try to sing, act or dance. Just enjoy being pretty and shut up!

Happy Holidays!

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Walt, this is for you

Speaking of Chinese Food on Christmas

see prior post to get the reference.

Sad, so so sad.

Yesterday I caught a mistake on Food Network. What saddens me so is who made it. Yes, it was she. My goddess messed up. It was not a huge glaring mistake, but a mistake none the less. Giada was preparing a meal for a dinner party - Braciola, broccoli rabe, bread sticks and an endive salad. I am actually making this meal (save the endive salad) for dinner on Christmas Eve (can't have Chinese until the next day). At the end of the episode they showed everyone at the table eating ( I love when they show the event for which Giada was cooking. Watching people rave about her food is fun). Anyway, so there they are, Giada, Todd and 2 other couples, sitting around the table. Giada is telling everyone what each dish is. However, the broccoli rabe is not served. She made it. I saw her do it. Yet, when it came time to eat - no broccoli rabe. It wasn't even mentioned. It was as if she never made it.

I would have preferred her saying something like, "I made broccoli rabe, but it didn't come out well, so I decided not to serve it." At least acknowledge that you made it. I don't care if it was bad. In fact I would welcome seeing that not everything Giada makes comes out well. She's a human being and allowed to make mistakes. But pretending it never existed bothers me.

Friday, December 21, 2007

A Reality That Scares Me

There are 3 kinds of reality shows. High end like Project Runway, middle like Survivor and low end like Being Bobby Brown. Well, I was recently turned onto one of the lowest of the low, VH1's I Love New York 2. Not only is this show pure trash, IT IS THE SECOND time they've done it.

This show is a take off of shows like The Bachelor. New York, whose real name is Tiffy Pollard, is trying to find her ideal man. New York was a Flavor of Love girl to give you some idea of the quality of his show. I caught onto this show when there were only 2 episodes left, but that was enough. New York is totally ghetto. Huge fake boobies that are spilling out of her dress, extensions, nails and no command of the English language. She is the black version of trailer trash.

New York gets advice from her mother, Sister Patterson. I have no clue where that name came from, because she is definitely not a nun. If someone had told me she was was born a man (before I knew she was New York's mother), I would have believed it. Better still, a man who used to be a Cher impersonator.

By the time I learned of this show, New York had narrowed down her field of suitors to 3. At the end of the episode, she got rid one of the only two decent men she had left, a Harvard educated lawyer. Instead, she chose to keep Buddha, a man who she had eliminated once but then brought back. This guy is a total player and is playing her like a violin. The two of them could reenact Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolff. She throws him out and then as soon as he leaves, chases after him. He is totally doing the "act like a self involved dick who doesn't like her" routine. And she is falling for it. Only thing is, for him it is no act. She will scream, "I hate you!" and then run after him not to leave her. They are like Ike and Tina. Even her mother tells her not to keep him around.

Her other remaining suitor is Tailor Made (as in tailor made for her). He is a total spineless dork. He buys her dresses and jewelery to stay in her favor. He is the exact opposite of Buddha. He would do anything New York tells him to. And he has insanely shiny skin.

On one of her dates with the men, she goes to Parrot Jungle. In her confessional speech she say, "We arrived at the Parrot Jungle and I immediately get nervous. I'm like, 'oh my goodness!'. I knew there was gonna be parrots there." No shit, the place is called Parrot Jungle. What was your first clue that there would be parrots there? And just when you think it can't get worse, she speaks again, "I'm afraid of parrots cuz they don't know how to speak english diction." Oh New York, Queen of Irony. Using that "logic" everyone should be truly terrified of her.

However frightening that was, my favorite moment of the series (OK, I am only going on 2 episodes here) was when Sister Patterson and has a little heart-to-heart chat with Tailor Made. She is trying to help him win, not necessarily because she thinks he is great, but because Buddha is pure trouble. She tells him to close his eyes and then she slaps him across the face!!! HARD! And not just one slap, but the forehand and the backhand. It was one of those moments like on L.A. Law (if you have never heard of this show, you are too young) when Rosalyn Shays proposed to Leland McKenzie and then fell down the elevator shaft. You're stunned and thinking, "did I just see that?" And then when the reality of what just happened sinks in a second later you burst out with a hearty laugh while thinking, "holy crap!" Here, watch it for yourself.

This takes reality TV to a such a low level that even I am shocked. I won't reveal who she picked at the end. But it really doesn't matter because they won't stay together. This is a reality dating show after all. Other than Ryan and Trista, I don't know of any other reality couples that have lasted.

Saturday, December 15, 2007

What a Feeling

This week on PR we saw the untimely departure of Jack. But good for him for putting his health first. I do hope he gets his MRSA infection taken care of. Maybe they will bring him back next season.

Poor Steven, he got hosed on the challenge. For anyone who didn't watch it, the models this week were replaced by women who had each lost a significant amount of weight. Each designer was assigned one woman and had to makeover her favorite outfit from her heavier days into something she could wear everyday. Steven got stuck with one of the most god awful wedding dresses I have ever seen. That satiny material was covered in beads and based on all the reading on it I have done (thank you BPR) the material is amazingly hard to work with. Also, how sad it i that someone's favorite outfit is her wedding dress? Moreover, would you ever want someone to take your wedding dress apart? Who knows, maybe there was a nasty divorce. Steven's design was awful, he made the woman look like a pilgrim. He was aufed.

The best line of the night came from Tim. After Jack's departure, they brought back Chris who was aufed last week. As he was starting later than the other designers, he was allowed to work all night reather than ending at midnight like everyone else. When talking to Chris, Tim advised him to make all his decisions now, because, "I've made more bad decisions at three o'clock in the morning than I can list." Of course he didn't mean it the way everyone in the work room and watching at home took it. When he caught on to why everyone was laughing he started cracking up too. Yay for you Tim.

The designers this season are definitely talented. Snaps to Christian for winning the challenge this week. Even though I find you grating, your outfit was great. But now that Jack is gone, who are you going to get piggy-back rides from?

As a tribute to Jack, I am now going to share with you a video he made for Youtube. Enjoy! Hint: the title of today's post is a big clue.

Friday, December 14, 2007

Another Hoiday Ditty

This is a real commercial running this season on TV. It is a commercial for Victoria's Secret in which Heidi Klum "sings." This is also just a teaser for an up coming holiday music posting.

So Close!

Well, on Wednesday night, the winner of this cycle of ANTM was chosen. If you recall, after the season premier, I called Chantal as the winner. She was the runner up. Yes, that means she lost, but I was so close. Runner up is not a bad thing. The winner was Saleisha. At the final runway show, Saleisha nailed it and definitely did better than Chantal. Chantal was just too stiff and broke character when one of the performers alongside the runway fell down.

So, congratulations Saleisha. You are America's Next Top Model.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

She Didn't Mean Phat!

Janice Dickinson, former ANTM judge and self proclaimed world's first supermodel, called Tyra Banks fat on the Today Show. Janice was discussing Jennifer Love Hewitt's recently released bikini photos. They are not flattering shots. However, Janice said JLH is not fat, and that if you want to see someone fat, look at Tyra Banks. She then tried to back peddle, but to no avail. She put it out there for the entire world to hear. Tyra may not be as thin as she was during her modeling days, but she is not fat. Not by any stretch of the imagination.

Janice is the last person who has any right to comment on someone else's looks. She herself looks like a plastic surgery nightmare. She is so stretched, pulled, botoxed and inflated that she actually looks like a living caricature of herself.

Here is the video clip. The actually comments are at one minute 15 seconds in.

Sunday, December 9, 2007

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Show Combination!!!

You, my loyal readers, know how much I love it when there is a cross over between two shows. Well, next week it will happen again. The shows, Real Housewives of Orange County (yeah, I know I said I was going to stop watching) and Project Runway. Austin Scarlett of PR season 1 will be on RHOC helping Lauri pick out her wedding gown. It will be like a bonus scene of PR!

Back to the Start

Kudos to all the competitors on Biggest Loser. They have all lost amazing amounts of weight. Last night I could really see the difference. They are all starting to look great. During the show, after each commercial break they would show photos of competitors from seasons past, where each started and where he or she was at the finale of their season. It was interesting to see that many of the prior seasons competitors started out weighing less than this season's remaining competitors after 11 weeks at the Biggest Loser Campus. And, as I said, the remaining 5 have each lost considerable amounts of weight. Just goes to show how big they were to begin with.

Last week the last member of the Red Team was eliminated. This is the first time an entire team has been eliminated prior to the finale. Then again, they used to only have 2 teams, not 3. This means that trainer Kim is no longer on the show for the rest of the season. But, there are only 2 episodes left, so not a big deal. I just wonder if she will be back next season. After last night's show, of the remaining 5 competitors. 4 are from the Black Team and 1 is from the Blue Team. Part of me wants Neil, the final Blue Team member eliminated next week, so that the final four are all from Jillian's Black Team. However, she would gloat so much that I don't know if I could actually watch it. Neil will likely not be eliminated next week though.

As this season wore on and teams were reformed, Jillian's strategy with the Black Team was to have them steadily eliminate member of the other teams. While this may have helped with team unity, in the long run it hurt them. Rather than competing as individuals, they operated as a group. This had the result of each member of the Black Team now being pitted against one another and seriously damaging each of their chances of winning. When all is said and done, this is still a competition. Some of the remaining members of the Black Team are big threats to their teammates. They should have been eliminated early on. Yes, initially you want big losers on your team to avoid elimination, but at some point, you need to start eliminating them to help your own chances of winning. Even though Jillian wanted her team to lose weight and get healthy, I think her personal goal was to have the Black Team be the only ones in the final four. She knew what she was doing by telling them who to eliminate. As long as the winner is one of her trainees, she will be happy. She does not have the same motivation as the competitors who want to be The Biggest Loser. She didn't let them compete for themselves and in the end, that is going to hurt them.